Heide's Blog

Ypsi is not what I expected it to be. The roads, full of potholes, outline neighborhoods littered with CONDEMNED houses and businesses. Chipped paint, broken doorbells, and sunken porches are expected. People loiter in groups of two and three along intersections, staring down anyone who bothers looking their way. Marijuana shops nestle between Jimmy John’s and college party stores. Sirens are heard from all directions daily. Advice, like “do not go out alone after nine, even if you’re walking across the street,” finds a home in the back of our heads. But I expected all this. What I did not expect is the peace.

Ypsi is at peace with herself. She knows what she is, a broken, but beautiful city, and her angels, the residents living here, embrace her. Life has etched hard lines into the faces of the people; experience has taught them to buy six locks for their doors, and yet, peace still floods the streets. The only fear that I encounter originates from within me.

Today was day two of outreach. When I say outreach, I mean that we missionaries go door-to-door in groups of two or three, asking people if and how we can pray for them. It sounds so incredibly easy, but it’s terrifying. The fears of rejection, of miscommunication, of danger, of heated rebuke, and of silence all take hold of me. And yet, all we’re there to do is pray.

Yesterday, the first day of outreach, I was semi-relieved whenever no one came to the door. All we did was pray three Hail Marys, then for the house and its inhabitants. When people actually opened the door to us, though, I felt like I was in uncharted waters. That fear pervaded my thoughts. Today, I knew something in me had to change. I could not continue pretending to be a “missionary” if I wasn’t totally committed to putting my fears aside to follow in Christ’s footsteps. So I offered it to God… what else was there to do?

And (praise God!) in an outpouring of His grace, today, everything DID change… My heart was finally opened to a tiny bit of the peace surrounding me, and it gave me so much strength. By the end of the hour and a half, I was able to walk up to people on the street, telling them of our ministry, and inviting them to join us in prayer. I probably talked to at least 9 people, most being incredibly receptive to our message. The peace of Christ, the same peace that Ypsi seems to have, was truly with me, despite my many fears. The one thought running through my head was, “I refuse to regret.”

So, to end this blog post, I just want to reiterate that I know Christ is here in Ypsilanti. I know it’s his peace that I feel surrounding my fellow missionaries and me. Christ doesn’t need my service here, but if he can use me, I want to be used.